MacGyver Fan Fiction -- Lost Love: Chapter 3

Based on the episode Lost Love.

Other Chapters: 1, 2

The years that followed were good for my career. I traveled the world performing missions for the KGB, and my excellent work was recognized. But I wasn't happy. In fact, I developed a deep sense of self-loathing over what I had done to MacGyver and what I had given up by letting him go. At first, I thought of him every day and imagined the life we could have had together. As time went on, I tried my best to forget that he ever existed, but that effort only resulted in self-pity and depression.

Our paths didn't cross again until two years later when China was participating in a cultural exposition in Seattle. They brought along a priceless artifact, the Ming Dragon, and put a Phoenix Foundation team led by MacGyver in charge of its security. I got my orders from General Racoubian, a wily KGB old-timer -- he and I were to head to Seattle along with Nicolaj Kosov, a major who had previously been thwarted by MacGyver in Hungary, and Tanya Lyaschenka, a brutish and sadistic blonde. Our goal was to compel MacGyver to steal the dragon -- then we'd recover it and return it to China in hopes of irreparably damaging US-Sino relations while strengthening our ties with the Chinese.

The old me would have been over the moon to see him, but I was so depressed by that point that I just wanted the mission to be over with as soon as possible. We met on a boat, and I deceived him by telling him that he had seen me get shot two years ago. I also lied when I told him that I had married Kosov, a fellow prisoner in the gulag, and that we wanted to defect.

I escaped during MacGyver's friend Jack's magic show, but apparently Tanya didn't get the memo from Racoubian as to what was going on, because she went crazy and started firing real bullets at me. As I escaped with MacGyver, who did his best to elude my team, I briefly thought, "What if we get away, what will I do?" But the net closed in on us, and my team proceeded with the plan, which was to hold me as a faux-hostage in exchange for MacGyver stealing the Ming Dragon.

MacGyver did end up stealing the dragon and defeating his own security system to do it -- I never doubted him for a second. After he and Jack traded the dragon for me in an old warehouse, we escaped by car. Incredibly, I found myself in the exact same situation that I had been in two years ago -- as a KGB agent, cover still in tact, with a chance to run away with MacGyver for good.

Whereas earlier I betrayed MacGyver out of fear, this time I did it out of sheer contempt for myself. It may be hard for you to understand, because who among us can be so fortunate as to be gifted such a golden opportunity to rectify a past mistake, but I was so far gone that I truly didn't want myself to be happy. All I could think about was getting rid of MacGyver so that he'd be out of my life forever. When we arrived at the KGB compound and he saw that I betrayed him, his look of disgust hurt me in my core while also beautifully fulfilling my masochistic vision for myself.

I couldn't resist him when he took one of my hairpins to use as a lock pick, even though I knew this would be the end of me, one way or another. After he and Jack started to escape in Racoubian's chopper, Kosov and Racoubian were about to open fire on them when instinct took over and I knocked both of them to the ground. I even gave Kosov a good whack with Racoubian's cane, although not quite good enough as I would learn less than a minute later.

In that brief instant, the old me was back. I yelled to MacGyver to wait for me, and he brought the chopper down. As I ran toward him, he looked deeply into my eyes and time slowed down. I had finally overcome my fear and self-loathing, and now I was going to be where I belonged -- with him.

I wish I could say that my death was faked again and that I was alive and living happily with him, but that is not the case. Kosov put a bullet in my back, and I died in MacGyver's arms. "MacGyver, I do love you."

THE END

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